Thursday, January 6, 2011

A tribute to Victoria Lee Breen Kalkbrenner


This is a tribute to my mom, Vicki Kalkbrenner, and all her glorious, kooky, silly, & interesting 53 years on planet Earth. She was born on this day, January 7, in 1958 at around 5am at Barnes-Jewish Hospital. My grandmother, Virginia Orlando Breen, went in the night before to give birth to her first-born and only daughter. I hear it was cold on January 7, but when is it not cold in St. Louis, Missouri during Winter?! My grandma and grandpa proceeded to have 3 more children, all boys (Robert Jr, Steven, and Timothy), but Victoria remained the princess. My mom has had a a pretty full life, one filled with great joy, hardships, wonderful events, and true blessings. No one can ever say that she and my father ever had it easy, especially raising 2 bratty twins (I love you, Chris!), but the hardships they endured taught my brother and I life lessons that we shall never forget.

Disclaimer: Mom, there are not a lot of "Victoria" songs out there, but I think you can appreciate the ones I had Darrell dig up for you!

The first song is only fitting for my mother, the princess. It is "Victoria" by The Kinks, released in 1969 on the concept album Arthur (Or the Decline and Fall of the British Empire). It is, of course, about Queen Victoria. Ray Davies wrote the lyrics in satirical fashion about 19th century Britain. I think these particular lines apply to my mom, although she is obviously not a real queen: "From the rich to the poor, Victoria loved them all". So true about my mom! She actually once loved a cow named Lucky that was 3 times her size!


The next song I (or rather Darrell) found is one called "Victoria" (also known as "Victoria Lee"....crazy right?!) by the Old 97's released on the album Wreck Your Life on May 23, 1996. The line I particularly like, although all of them are great, is "Victoria, you dance so fast that no one else can see." My mom, though, puts on a show when she dances. Now I don't know how many of you have witnessed this, but I am guessing all of her friends and family have. It is a sight to behold! When she & my dad decide to dirty dance to "Mustang Sally", you better get your ass off the dance floor for there is no competing with their talent.


The last song that I have chosen to feature is a ridiculous one! "Victoria" by Lavvi Ebbel was released on the album Victoria in1982. Although a Belgium pop band, this song is mostly in English except for the occasion French words and phrases thrown in here and there. This song was apparently a huge hit. I wish I could say that there are lyrics here that I can somehow apply to my mother, but unfortunately I cannot. She's not rich or young (well, youth is in the eye of the beholder or the one who is turning older), she doesn't have a sports car (even though the Lincoln Town Car is a nice ride), she doesn't live in Paris (is Cedar Hill close?), and she doesn't really phone me (though she texts like a madman).

The bottom line is that I love my mother no matter what. I wouldn't have spent my Monday evening researching these songs to come up with stuff that I could apply to her. She is the reason I live, the reason I haven't been poor since I moved to Los Angeles 3+ years ago, and the reason that I become more ridiculous as I get older. I hate to say it, but you do kind of turn into your parents as you get older. Sure you do things differently than they did, but I find myself making up nonsense songs, talking gibberish to the dog, and dancing in the aisles of the grocery store. Thanks, Mom, for being you and Happy Birthday! I love you!

Here is the seventh spectacular Don’t Tell Betsy promo for our upcoming video: Collect them!

Plus!! Don't Tell Betsy's brand new single, "The Way I Do". Give it a listen.

And here is another multi-million dollar promo. True, most of the money was spent on alcohol, but we did spend it.

If you'd like to own this song, it be available below.

And on I-tunes

Download "The Way I Do" from iTunes:
Don't Tell Betsy
The Way I Do - Single - Don't Tell Betsy

Promo #6

Promo #5